How to be a Good House Guest: Holiday Visitor Etiquette Tips

Holidays can be the best time to get families and friends together for an extended visit. The kids are out of school, the adults have time off from work, and there’s just nothing like enjoying a festive event with those you don’t get to see enough.

While it is a joyful season, it must be said that the traveling and hosting that goes hand in hand with holiday get-togethers can also be overwhelming – for the host and the guest!

Whether it’s sleeping in your old room at Mom and Dad’s, couch surfing with friends, or bunking with cousins, if you’re spending the night in someone else’s home, it’s probably a good time to brush up on some house guest etiquette to make the visit truly enjoyable. It doesn’t matter if you plan on dropping by for a short stint or settling in for a more extended stay, following these house guest tips will definitely increase the chance of getting an invite back.

Keep scrolling for our 6 tips on how to be a good house guest – for the holidays, and beyond.

House Guest Etiquette Rule #1: Bring a Gift

House guests should always bring a gift for their hosts. It doesn’t have to be an enormous or lavish present by any means, but something thoughtful and kind presented with gratitude will start the visit off on the right foot. Some of our favorite gifts for hosts include a bottle of wine, artisanal olive oil, flowers, candles or a vintage treasure.

If the home you’re staying in has kids, you’ll instantly get bonus points by busting out some candy and small toys. This will make the littles warm up to you pretty immediately, which is important – especially if they’ve been moved so you can stay in one of their rooms!

House Guest Etiquette Rule #2: Clear Arrival and Departure Dates

Let your hosts know exactly how long you plan to stay.
Free Image via Unsplash.

Benjamin Franklin is often quoted as saying, “Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.” Keep that in mind as you choose the length of your stay and be sure to communicate arrival and departure dates well in advance of the visit. Being vague about your plans when you’re on someone else’s turf is not just bad house guest manners – it’s bad form in general.

If you’re expecting your hosts to pick you up at the airport, aim to keep them over-informed of any delays or other changes in the schedule. Also provide your hosts with the flight carrier and flight number that you’re coming in on so that they can track any delays themselves from the ground.

House Guest Etiquette Rule #3: Respect the House Rules

As a house guest, you must always be aware that you are in someone else’s territory. As such, it’s important you follow the rules of house, even if they’re not explained directly to you.

First, ask before you access or touch anything outside of your “guest quarters” (that includes the thermostat). Find out the general waking and quiet hours, along with any necessary details about the kids and pets.

Second, turn your Spidey sense on and observe the routines of the house. Your guests may be too shy (or well-mannered) to explicitly call you out on bad house guest manners – like continuing to wear your shoes after everyone else has left theirs at the door or leaving your guest room a shambles throughout the day – but they will definitely notice. And remember.

House Guest Etiquette Rule #4: Help Clean Up

If you’re wondering how to be a good guest, helping your hosts clean or tidy is the place to start. Doing the dishes immediately after meals, wiping down countertops, cleaning bathrooms after use – the list of what needs your attention should be relatively obvious. And if you’re not sure exactly what to do or how to help? Get creative. Take the trash to the curb. Help the kids pick up their rooms. Bring the dog to get groomed. Wash your host’s car (especially if they’re letting you drive it). As a house guest, you need simply look for areas you can help – and then go ahead and get it done.

Love cooking? Make a dinner or take your hosts out for a night.
Free Image via Unsplash.

While cleaning up is an extremely important part of being a good house guest – so is not creating messes in the first place. If you tend to be a bit untidy, try to pick up your clothes, make your bed, and not leave your personal items strewn around the house (or all over the bathroom counter). Everyone feels calmer and more comfortable in a clean house.

House Guest Etiquette Rule #5: Be Present in the Moment

Put in the work to truly connect with your hosts by setting aside distractions and being present in the moment. This means storing your laptop, putting your phone down, and really making an effort to engage with the family or friends you’re visiting. It can be difficult to tear ourselves away from our screens, but it is important to give your hosts the attention and respect they deserve.

That said, also be sure to take time for yourself. While introverts might find it especially stressful to stay constantly engaged during a visit, anyone can get fed up after spending too much time with someone else. Be sure to focus on your needs as well as those of your host. It will serve to make the trip as enjoyable as can be for all involved.

House Guest Etiquette Rule #6: Celebrate Your Visit – and Your Departure

Do something nice for your hosts before you leave.
Free Image via Pixabay.

It’s always a nice gesture to either make dinner (or take your hosts out) on the last night of the visit. If you’re not especially handy in the kitchen, it is also more than OK to order a takeout spread. Make sure your hosts know your plan in advance, so that they’re not surprised (especially if they’re the type to pull something together themselves for your last night).

The festive good-bye dinner is a perfect chance to end your visit on the highest of notes, reminiscing about your trip and maybe even daydreaming about your next get-together.

The above tips about how to be a good house guest will hopefully help smooth any bumps during your holiday visits this year. If it’s still not going quite as well as expected, it’s more than OK to ask your hosts if there is anything in particular you can do to help shoulder some more of the load.

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